If the thought of signing up for an online dating service without any help is scary, you can hire a ghostwriter to help you out. You might have even encountered some of these ghostwriters yourself and not have known it. Essentially, writers are paid to build your profile in a way that’s pleasing and more likely to get you dates. Thrillist even profiled an online dating ghostwriter who took details submitted by would-be daters and turned them into dating bios and even conversation starters. If this sounds like something you would benefit from, there are numerous services you can sign up for.
A massive 20% of relationships and over 17% of marriages start online and there are hundreds of apps that claim to put love in the palm of your hand. It doesn’t matter whether you’re desperate to choose matching PJs or you simply fancy a flirt, connecting to like-minded people has never been easier. Here’s the lowdown on 5 of the best dating apps around:
Features for introverts: The SmartPick can really be your best friend, serving as the best icebreaker. If both you and someone you're interested in both vote "yes" on each other's profiles, the SmartPick feature will let you know the good news by email and shoot you a message in your Zoosk inbox. Another good option is the Super Send feature, which could help eliminate the scary feeling from being the one to make the first move. Choose a message to break the ice, then allow Zoosk to blast it out for you using Super Send. If someone indicates they're interested by writing back, then you get to view each other's profiles.
Feeld is an app for people who know what they want. It describes itself as a place to “meet open-minded couples and singles near you,” making it the premiere app for unicorns and those who want a more openly kink-friendly app experience. While that may sound pretty niche, Veronica*, 35, who lives in Queens, says Feeld became her favorite dating app. At the time of download, she was single and recovering from a bad breakup. She used Tinder and Bumble for regular dating, but hated the experience. “None of the men seemed cute enough, and a lot of them were exactly as gross and Air-Drop-a-dick-pic-slimy as the stereotypes go,” she explains.
‘It’s always tempting to ‘accidentally’ check out a date’s social media accounts before meeting up. In fact, our research shows that over a third (38%) of us admit to a pre-date Google. Try to avoid it, if possible. In-depth social media stalking will make you form judgments before you’ve even sat down together so prioritise getting to know the real person, rather than their online persona.’
The OkCupid app is much more like a traditional dating site than most apps, because that's what it used to be, and still is, with the added convenience that you can now use it on your phone. You set up a profile which includes questions about things like your interests, lifestyle and what you're looking for in a relationship. You then get to browse profiles which will display a match percentage based on how much you have in common. People who use OkCupid find this a helpful way to filter through potential dates and find someone with whom they're going to have lots in common.
She’s not without her complaints about the dating app format in general, though. “On principle, I don’t really like that I’m being reduced to a Pokémon card with a few photos and stats and swiping based on that,” she says. “But I got extraordinarily lucky and met my now-boyfriend, who downloaded Bumble for nearly the same reason I did! We agree that it we both felt icky making snap judgments based on dumb things while first using the app, but I guess there was enough thoughtful info that was in each of our profiles that led us to swipe and meet.”
A lot of dating websites and apps advertise the fact that they’re free, but be careful what you’re signing up for. Setting up a profile is always free, but most of the websites we tested offered only some of their matching services free of charge. Many dating websites make you pay to view user photos and send messages. Dating apps, on the other hand, are predominantly free. Upgrades are available if you want to use the app’s extra features, but for the most part a free account is all you need.
You can set your answers to be publicly available, or you can choose to set all (or some) to private. The more questions you answer, the more information the site can use to match you with others – and the more others can determine whether you are a match for them. When someone contacts you, you can see how much of a “Match,” “Friend,” or “Enemy” they are based upon how their answers compare to yours.
If you want to know more about someone, you can always just ask the friend you have in common, which is a human touch that’s absent from most apps. Moreover, people can message you only if you’ve matched, so there are no unsolicited “greetings”. You can see what sort of relationship people are looking for, and while that doesn’t sound that revolutionary, it reflects the fact that Hinge carries more of a dating expectation than a just-hooking-up expectation à la Tinder. Furthermore, because of the friends-of-friends connection, you’re less likely to run across inappropriate photos. That’s a plus in our book.
OKCupid uses an algorithm to match you up with others, sort of like Zoosk does if you’ve ever used that. It takes your personality test questions and profile answers into account and then tries to find the best matches for you to message and get to know. This is the DoubleTake feature I talk a little bit more about below. You have the ability to look at anyone’s full profile, which is usually very detailed and gives their personality test information. When you search, you can filter out what you are looking for in your date. However, you can only look up users who are online, so the search the options that come back will be limited.
Singapore's Social Development Network is the governmental organization facilitating dating activities in the country. Singapore's government has actively acted as a matchmaker for singles for the past few decades, and thus only 4% of Singaporeans have ever used an online dating service, despite the country's high rate of internet penetration.
The experts say: This infamous dating site claims to have no unattractive members and is known for deleting members who gained weight. Aspiring members have to pass a 48-hour peer vote to be accepted as one of the ‘beautiful people’. They regularly host members’ events where allegedly you have to look as attractive as your profile photo otherwise entry to the venue is refused. This is the ideal site for those who want to bypass the usual filtering of profiles based on looks and focus on getting to know people they know they will be attracted to.